Johathan Clements, the WSJ personal finance columnist, has some tongue-in-cheek definitions of common Wall Street and financial phrases in his column, a few excerpts:
Profit-taking: All-purpose explanation for why the market went down.
Technical factors: Alternative all-purpose explanation for why the market went down. Also useful for explaining why the market went up or sideways.
Futures: Trade these too much, and you won't have one.
Federal Reserve: Extremely powerful, like God, and also moves in strange and mysterious ways.
GETTING GOING Some Financial Lingo Redefined
Wall Street Journal
January 7, 2006